“i call it writing the write downs “

re-posting  my prev blog :

as i was  scanning the pages of a magazine i  picked up words that caught my attention .. create  one whole notes with  it by  putting it in between phrases in my thought    .. look what  i’ve created  .. something  deeper  than  my laughter  ..deeper  than my OAness ..deeper than  my  broken heart ..deepr than my shattered dreams  …deeper  than what i expcted it to be …the  words and phrases in capital letters  are the words that caught my eyes…

i’m not really sure why i’ve decided  for this  vacation,maybe i’m tooexhausted w/ what’s life  had been in the past  5 yrs or  maybe  i want to stop for awhile & think over  THINGS  LEFT & THINGS  I NEED TO KEEP  or probably i want to just say GO AHEAD SPOIL YOURSELF YOU DESERVE IT, as i get nearer to the time that i’m going  to take  a break relax a little bit  i realized that  i’m in SEARCH OF A PLACE that i call my own i have BIG IDEAS that pops up every now and then it’s like a MEGAPHONE  shouting  at the back  of my mind, it’s  WAXING OVER  in the  deepest  part of my  heart, but there’s this fear that is about to SELF-DESTRUCT my senses, as i continue  to UNBUILT  this pessimism i need something  to INSPIRE  me  something  that  will soften this SPOT  in my heart that’s been harden through time  and as i continue writting  and drinking  my cup of COFFEE i  realized the TRUTH  that even in this world of ACCEPTED LIES   all iever been looking  for  is the real meaning  of the word HAPPINESS . and  no matter how i tried and no matter how  the world  ROCKS, there are really times that  u feel  like  ONE MULITPLIED  set  of hard times.

then just  as i was done reading this piece  i finally realized  that i wasn’t just  jotting down this words  because it caught my  attention i pick these words because  it’s  what i felt  right now  ..i’m COLLECTING  FRAGMENTS of  what i felt and what i wish  deep inside me  ..hoping  to create a better  TRANSFORMATION  in the end  …  so when i reah 69 AND A HALF  life is a little bit better than this.

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